Foundational Skills Every Child Needs to Learn for Life
Every parent wants to give their child a great start to life. So….. the questions parents often think about is how do I do this? What does my child need to know before they go off to school? How can I make sure they succeed academically?
Amazingly this doesn’t begin when a child is three or even four years old. It has nothing to do with A, B, C’s, or 1,2, 3, or even shapes and colors. Parents begin teaching skills which help their children succeed in school and later in life from the moment they are born!! Let’s take a look at what foundational skills children need to learn in early childhood which many parents have never even thought about.
Self Regulation
The largest most important set of skills is emotional regulation. This begins when a child is very young. As we build a relationship with our child, they learn to trust us to meet their needs. For young babies, all their needs are met by Mom or Dad. By having these needs met, the child learns that the world is a safe place. They love reaching for their parent’s face and touching it. The parent responds with facial expressions.
Young children will often mimic a parent's facial expression. If a parent or trusted caregiver sticks out their tongue a baby will mimic them. This is a child’s first exposure to learning about emotions. Young children often cry when a caregiver is upset or yelling. The adult who is their anchor is unregulated and this causes the child to become unregulated. Let’s face it, we all have bad days. The child is learning about negative emotions during this time. As a caring adult, we don’t leave the child upset, we pick her up and talk calmly to her and she calms down. The child is beginning to learn the skill of self-regulation through co-regulation with their caring adult. By watching peers, or siblings a child learns more about emotions and self-regulation. Parents can support the child by reading books and bringing the characters' facial expressions to their child’s attention or talking about characters in television shows. Talking about other people's feelings is often less intense and easier for a young child, than examining their feelings. It takes several years of co-regulating with a caring adult until a child learns how to fully self-regulate independently. Self-regulation is a primary skill needed for school success.
Social Skills
Young children see the world as revolving around them and their own needs. It takes a lot of practice to learn that other people have needs and feelings too. This skill set is learned through playing with friends, taking turns, sharing, and helping others. Parents can work on these skills at home by taking turns playing with their child and explaining that they need to go load the dishwasher and they will be back in a few minutes. If a child wants to go to the park they can say “Sure we can go to the park, but first Mommy needs to put the clean clothes away.” Using a timer also helps with teaching this skill. The parent can say we will go after the timer goes off. Keep in mind it is really necessary to follow through and go after the timer goes off. Teaching a child to wait for a turn to do something they want to do, is referred to as teaching delayed gratification. Timers also help when children are learning to share toys. Each child needs to get an equal amount of time. It also might require an adult distracting the child who has to wait the first few times until they begin to understand that they will get a turn soon.
Every parent wants to give their child a great start to life. So….. the questions parents often think about is how do I do this? What does my child need to know before they go off to school? How can I make sure they succeed academically?
Amazingly this doesn’t begin when a child is three or even four years old. It has nothing to do with A, B, C’s, or 1,2, 3, or even shapes and colors. Parents begin teaching skills which help their children succeed in school and later in life from the moment they are born!! Let’s take a look at what foundational skills children need to learn in early childhood which many parents have never even thought about.
Self Regulation
The largest most important set of skills is emotional regulation. This begins when a child is very young. As we build a relationship with our child, they learn to trust us to meet their needs. For young babies, all their needs are met by Mom or Dad. By having these needs met, the child learns that the world is a safe place. They love reaching for their parent’s face and touching it. The parent responds with facial expressions.
Young children will often mimic a parent's facial expression. If a parent or trusted caregiver sticks out their tongue a baby will mimic them. This is a child’s first exposure to learning about emotions. Young children often cry when a caregiver is upset or yelling. The adult who is their anchor is unregulated and this causes the child to become unregulated. Let’s face it, we all have bad days. The child is learning about negative emotions during this time. As a caring adult, we don’t leave the child upset, we pick her up and talk calmly to her and she calms down. The child is beginning to learn the skill of self-regulation through co-regulation with their caring adult. By watching peers, or siblings a child learns more about emotions and self-regulation. Parents can support the child by reading books and bringing the characters' facial expressions to their child’s attention or talking about characters in television shows. Talking about other people's feelings is often less intense and easier for a young child, than examining their feelings. It takes several years of co-regulating with a caring adult until a child learns how to fully self-regulate independently. Self-regulation is a primary skill needed for school success.
Social Skills
Young children see the world as revolving around them and their own needs. It takes a lot of practice to learn that other people have needs and feelings too. This skill set is learned through playing with friends, taking turns, sharing, and helping others. Parents can work on these skills at home by taking turns playing with their child and explaining that they need to go load the dishwasher and they will be back in a few minutes. If a child wants to go to the park they can say “Sure we can go to the park, but first Mommy needs to put the clean clothes away.” Using a timer also helps with teaching this skill. The parent can say we will go after the timer goes off. Keep in mind it is really necessary to follow through and go after the timer goes off. Teaching a child to wait for a turn to do something they want to do, is referred to as teaching delayed gratification. Timers also help when children are learning to share toys. Each child needs to get an equal amount of time. It also might require an adult distracting the child who has to wait the first few times until they begin to understand that they will get a turn soon.
Listening to your child and making sure they listen to others is an important skill to work on. Hand in hand with listening is following directions. Young children need to be able to be given a one or two-step direction and they follow it. This becomes very important for safety when out around town or in a group of children. Give directions verbally and ask your child to follow them. This can be as simple as “Please get me the baby’s bottle.”, or “Can you bring me a book?”, to more difficult directions like, “Put your shoes on and come here. Another fun way to work on following directions is to play games like Simon Says. First, have the adult give the child silly directions, then switch and let the child give the parent silly directions to follow. Parents can take a child for a walk and play Red Light, Green Light. When the parent calls out Red Light the child must stop walking or running. When the parent says Green Light , the child can run again. This is a wonderful, fun to help children learn self control.
Another skill we want to build in our child is learning empathy. If someone close to a child is hurt or sick the child can do something nice for the hurt or sick child. It could be drawing a picture on a card, helping mom make cookies, or even just bringing a friend a Band-Aid for a boo-boo. By working together with others, the child can learn that he matters, and he can make a difference while gaining an understanding of other people.
Caring for the Environment and Materials
Another skill we want to build in our child is learning empathy. If someone close to a child is hurt or sick the child can do something nice for the hurt or sick child. It could be drawing a picture on a card, helping mom make cookies, or even just bringing a friend a Band-Aid for a boo-boo. By working together with others, the child can learn that he matters, and he can make a difference while gaining an understanding of other people.
Caring for the Environment and Materials
As an early childhood educator for thirty years, one of the most difficult things to teach young children, when it is not being taught at home, is cleaning up after themselves and caring for the classroom and materials. When parents start early with helping children learn to clean up, it becomes a lifelong skill that benefits them in school and beyond. In our culture in the United States, this is sometimes very difficult because young children have so many toys. My encouragement to all parents would be to clean out the toys they no longer play with and rotate the toys so that they have a manageable number of toys available that they can clean up based on their age. Young children can not clean up on their own, but when toys are sorted into bins with labels, they can choose one type of toy, with parental help, and clean up all that type of toy, such as picking up all the trucks and then picking up the baby dolls. When the environment around them is neat and orderly children are calmer and play better for longer periods of time. This increases independent play and builds concentration which they will need when entering school. The benefit to mom and dad is more peace and happier kiddos.
Fine Motor Skills
Fine Motor Skills
Before a child learns to write or even hold a pencil they need to develop the small muscles in their hands. Fine motor development is a complex process that includes awareness, cognitive planning, coordination, muscle strength, and normal sensation of movement of the fingers and toes, along with, precision of movement. Simple activities such as play dough and clay are great at developing these muscles. Games that use pinching clothespins, moving heavier objects such as rocks, placing objects in a hole in a container, sewing cards, and drawing with a stick in the dirt are all great examples of play-based activities that help develop fine motor control. Coloring inside the lines in a coloring book is also a great way to build hand muscle and finger control. Peeling tape off objects, using stickers, and ripping paper are also good ways to get young children to develop fine motor skills. Long before a child writes their name, they need to develop finger muscles, cognitive planning, and coordination. These are all easily worked on through fun activities caregivers can find on Pinterest and share with their child at home.
Gross Motor Skills
Gross Motor Skills
Gross motor skills are the movement of large muscles in the arms, legs, and torso. They require the coordination of muscles, bones, and nerves for proper coordination, body awareness, spatial awareness, balance, and reaction time. Examples are walking, jumping, waving, swinging, bike riding, or playing catch with a ball. Young children have to learn how their bodies move in space in relation to their surrounding environment. As children grow this is constantly changing as they get older and the size of their body and the strength of their muscles change. This means young children need a lot of opportunities for large body movements throughout the day. Different opportunities to use different muscles from different perspectives in different ways offer young children the chance to build neurological connections which help strengthen gross motor development. As a parent take time to lay down with your infant while they do tummy time, strengthening their core muscles, create an obstacle course for your toddler to practice new skills working with their body in space, and strengthen their muscles, or play catch with your preschooler or help them learn to skip. The amount of time a child spends outdoors in natural environments is directly related to the development of gross motor skills in children. As children become more coordinated and have more control over their bodies they become more self-assured and confident in their abilities.
Building Vocabulary and New Experiences
Building Vocabulary and New Experiences
Take your child out to explore the world around them. Stop by the police station or firehouse and donate a box of individually wrapped treats, thanking them for their service. Ask to see the fire truck and name different tools. Stop by a construction site down the street and talk about the different types of trucks. Visit the grocery store, and name the different fruits and vegetables. Visit the library, borrow a few books and learn about something new. A walk in the park or around the neighborhood provides the opportunity to listen for the different sounds. Name the things that make the sounds. Walk around the neighborhood and look for signs of the season. New flowers,
changing leaves, insects, and anything different you find on your trip. A moving truck or and delivery truck bringing a large box can be a great opportunity to guess where the people are moving to or what is in the box. Make homemade ice cream or bake a cake. All experiences help children build vocabulary. Knowledge is built one piece at a time and the more experiences a child has the more he becomes interested and inquisitive about the world outside the front door.
As a child’s first teacher, every parent can help their child have a great beginning. All children develop at different rates, but all children get a better start when they have parents who spend time daily interacting with their children. Children need to know they are safe and have caring people around them, they need parents who will talk to them, read to them, and play with them. This isn’t difficult or challenging. It doesn’t cost a lot of money. It can make a significant difference in your child’s ability to succeed in school and later in life.
changing leaves, insects, and anything different you find on your trip. A moving truck or and delivery truck bringing a large box can be a great opportunity to guess where the people are moving to or what is in the box. Make homemade ice cream or bake a cake. All experiences help children build vocabulary. Knowledge is built one piece at a time and the more experiences a child has the more he becomes interested and inquisitive about the world outside the front door.
As a child’s first teacher, every parent can help their child have a great beginning. All children develop at different rates, but all children get a better start when they have parents who spend time daily interacting with their children. Children need to know they are safe and have caring people around them, they need parents who will talk to them, read to them, and play with them. This isn’t difficult or challenging. It doesn’t cost a lot of money. It can make a significant difference in your child’s ability to succeed in school and later in life.
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